Hugh Hefner, A legend or an overhyped sex addict?
This evening, the 27th of September 2017, Hugh Hefner passed away of natural causes after 91 years of life. We know what is coming now, hundreds of his quotes, some old pictures, some obviously fake speeches about how he “influenced” someone’s life, and a series of related facebook profile picture.
That is the standard of today’s society and that is an article for another day.
Today, we are focusing on the Man, Hugh Hefner, and examining his life.
The Life Of Hugh Hefner
Hugh Hefner, a man lived so long that his first wife’s name was Mildred and his last wife’s name was Crystal. He was mostly known for the lavish lifestyle and the Playboy magazine, yet so little known of him in otherwise situations.
In today’s article, I want to examine Hugh Hefner as a dude and try to understand him, bearing in mind that after today’s tragedy, I will have to deal with the fact that I will never meet him in person, although I really wished to.
A boring google search will tell you that Hugh Hefner was born in 1926 in Chicago, a little more digging and you will find that he described his upbringing in Chicago as “Conservative, Midwestern, Methodist.“, Both of his parents were teachers.
He even once said in a 2011 interview: ‘My folks are Puritan. My folks are prohibitionists. There was no drinking in my home. No discussion of sex. And I think I saw the hurtful and hypocritical side of that from very early on.‘
It is amazing that with all the mounting evidence we have which clearly indicates that prohibition doesn’t really work and it will just encourage people to do the prohibited, we still think that it is the “solution” and we are just not “doing” it right.
Anyway, we have some idea how Hugh Hefner was raised, pretty chill and boring childhood, parents probably didn’t explore their life that much and just inherited the same ideas as the folks before them, and went on with it without question.
Living in such situation, and before the age of the internet, what would you do?
Well, for Hugh Hefner, he began drawing cartoons, and he spent most of his time doing that. It was also rumored that at the age of 9 he began publishing a neighborhood newspaper, which sold for a penny, but that is not confirmed.
High school, Hugh Hefner began publishing his own comic book, “School Daze”.
Hefner recalled that he first reinvented himself in high school in Chicago at 16 when he was rejected by a girl he had a crush on.
After High School, and between 1944 and 1946, Hugh Hefner served as a writer for a military newspaper in the US army.
After the military service, he studied Psychology, along with double minors in Arts and creative writing. He earned his degree in 2.5 years. After graduation, he took a semester of graduate courses in sociology but dropped soon after.
While in university, around 1949, he married his college sweetheart Mildred, and she was his first sexual experience. At the age of 22, the then virgin Hugh Hefner learned, just days before the wedding, the Mildred cheated on him while he was away for the military.
To write that at a slower pace:
The. Girl. That. Hugh. Hefner. Was. In. Love. With. And. Saved. Himself. For. Cheated. On. Him. While. He. Was. Away. For. Military. Service.
Hugh Hefner described the moment of confession as “The most devastating moment of my life“.
He went on and married her anyway.
In 1951, at the age of 25, he started working for his favorite magazine Esquire as a Copywriter but quit soon after over a dispute on 5$ raise he asked for.
In 1952, he had his first daughter Christie Hefner.
In 1953, he took out a mortgage, generating a bank loan of $600, and raised $8,000 from 45 investors, including $1,000 from his mother “Not because she believed in the venture but because she believed in her son.“, to launch Playboy, which was initially going to be called Stag Party. The first issue, published in December 1953, selling for 50cent, featured Marilyn Monroe –a woman he never met in person ever- from her 1949 nude calendar shoot and sold over 50,000 copies. In that year the first Playboy message appeared, which says: “We like our apartment. We enjoy mixing up cocktails and an hors-d’oeuvre or two, putting a little mood music on the phonograph and inviting in a female acquaintance for a quiet discussion on Picasso, Nietzsche, jazz, sex…“
In 1955, a short story called “The Crooked Man” about a straight dude living in a world where being gay was the norm, was sent to Esquire magazine to be published but it was rejected. Hugh Hefner picked up the story and published it in Playboy. The story got a lot of negative feedback to which Hugh Hefner responded to the criticism with “If it was wrong to persecute heterosexuals in a homosexual society then the reverse was wrong, too.“
In 1959 the first Playboy club opened in Chicago, it had a plate on the front door that reads: “If You Don’t Swing, Don’t Ring.” He divorced his first wife in the same year.
In 1963, the June issue of Playboy contained a nude photo shoot of the model and actress Jayne Mansfield. It was deemed too vulgar and obscene, which led to Hefner’s arrest. Charges were dropped against him after the jury was unable to reach a verdict.
In 1965, Hugh Hefner bought the 37-story Palmolive Building. The renamed Playboy Building houses the executive offices for HMH Publishing and Playboy Clubs International until 1989.
In 1971, he bought the Playboy Mansion West in Holmby Hills, California.
In 1972, the November issue of Playboy magazine was its best-selling issue to date, with over 7 million copies sold worldwide. It features Pam Rawlings on the cover, and the centerfold featured Lena Söderberg. On that same year, the first overseas edition was launched in Germany.
Many more events happen in his long, happy, and eventful life. But after 1972, we can clearly see that his life has turned into a piece of cake, no more drama, fear or unnecessary bullshit, he just enjoyed the flow of his early determined life.
What I want you to take out of this article is this.
Hugh Hefner, the most famous playboy on earth, lived a long and happy life, exactly how he wanted it. He did not die of a rotten penis, he didn’t die of too many STD’s, he didn’t die a horrible death in any shape or form, he just died. He died probably exactly like he would’ve died if he lived a boring and unaccomplished life.
Never assume that you will pay back the fun you had in life at the time of your death, that is just BS unaccomplished empty individuals tell themselves to feel a tiny little better about their life.
I lost count of how many times I was told “You will die an early lonely death due to the many STD’s you have“, apart from the fact that it is very disturbing how many people wish me this kind of death just because I am living my life the way I want, am I going to die such a horrible death like some people say and wish I do?
Probably not, sorry to disappoint.
The point is, people will try to do everything they can to stop you from having fun. It is one of the dark sides of humanity, most humans don’t like other humans to have fun unless they are involved. Me sleeping with x amount of girls have absolutely no effect on the life of those who hate me and wish me that kind of death, it just bothers them so much that it is the way it is.
We can see many examples of that in the life of Hugh Hefner, and how he absolutely gave zero flying fucks about it.
Another very admirable thing in the life of Hugh Hefner is how he dealt with so many shitshows yet with every problem he came back much stronger. The story of his first marriage can be the most important transformational point in his life. If you put yourself in his position, or if you have experienced a similar situation, you will understand his actions and why he did what he did.
Hugh Hefner came from a very religious background, he believed in the institution of marriage, and probably was told to just be a “good boy”. He somehow went with it until his marriage, when one line uttered by the woman he loved completely destroyed years and years of false beliefs, at that exact moment, everything just broke down to pieces. The very admirable thing in the way that Hugh Hefner dealt with this was the fact he did not resort to hate and bitterness, he did not blame his wife or regret his life decisions, he just accepted the fact, and understood that the logic he was following was the one to blame.
Most people disagree with the life of a playboy, but we can all agree that it is a thousand times better than the life of an angry and bitter man. Honestly, after a very harsh realization, a breakup or any of the like, these are your only options, you can just get back up and enjoy certain and controllable events such as having sex with gorgeous women and sharing good times with people, or you can get bitter and start hallucinating that AWALT and girls are all whores who are only after XYZ. You don’t have and will not follow approach A or B for a long period of time, but it will definitely shape you and play a major role in who you become.
One last takeaway from the great life of Hugh Hefner is that, yes he did not invent or discover anything, he did not cure cancer or feed the poor, he was not benevolent in almost anyway, so should you take a guy like that, who only lived for himself and did what he enjoyed, without doing that many good deeds as an idol?
Well, in my opinion, definitely.
I hear this everywhere, “stop making stupid people famous”. Like we have any standards for who is allowed to become famous or for what, and as if these standards involve anything to do with being a “good person”.
Like we have any standards for who is allowed to become famous or for what, and as if these standards have anything to do with being a “good/smart person”.
Despite what hundreds and of Youtube videos have taught you, you cant be “anything”. You have only a punch of choices in your life, and you have very limited time to pursue your choice.
You cant be a playboy, billionaire, scientist, philanthropist, etc. all at the same time, each of these ventures will probably require a lifetime of pursuing and hard working. You might get insanely rich that it enables you to be a bunch of these titles all at the same time, but in your pursuit to become that insanely rich you will most likely do a bunch of things that completely contradict your principles and values.
Life is not black and white, hypocrisy is everywhere. People will try their best to use fear and guilt to stop you from doing what they do not dare to do. These people might be right and might be wrong, their opinion should be considered, it should be taken into account, but 99% you will find it is just hatred, nothing else.
Hugh Hefner did impressive things, whether you agree with his life or not, he is still a very accomplished man who came from nothing. I do not recommend copying him or modeling yourself exactly after him, Hugh Hefner is an example of someone who lived all out, and did not suffer huge consequences.
It is a very frightening decision to just go against the flow, to just go for what you really want without holding back, but every once in a while a great man comes our way that shows us crystal clear that
“Hey, it can be done.”
That was it, gentlemen,