Oneitis/One itis: The definition, the reality, and the cure.
Before talking about Oneitis, let’s talk about Emotions: a subjective, conscious experience characterized primarily by psychophysiological expressions, biological reactions, and mental states.
Emotions: what drive us and what drive us astray.
Emotions: what fucks us up the most as
Having emotions isn’t the worst part, being enslaved by them surely is.
You are a slave to your emotions, probably, you will always be. Only a selected few evade it to be free from emotional slavery, to be masters of your soul. – As appealing as that may sound, it is one of the worst things a man can do to himself, a later article on that.
Oneitis or One-itis: A Feeling that a certain girl is one of a kind, unique, and no other girl could compete with her. You think she is the perfect one for you. You can’t get her out of your mind, although you didn’t know her for an extended period.
Getting over Oneitis is the same as getting over your crush, going over the one that got away…, etc.
Oneitis is to be distinguished from getting over a past relationship, the period and reality of the connection between the two involved parties are the major differences here.
In the case of Oneitis, the relationship is very one-sided and very imaginary.
And the period is of actual contact between you and the girl is short in total.
Oneitis happens when you involve your emotions too often too early.
It varies in forms and degrees; from a newbie getting obsessed over a girl who doesn’t even know he exists, to a Supreme Man who had hundreds of 10’s in his life and can bed any girl effortlessly.
Damn that fucker inside your skull you call “brain,” he likes to fuck things up from time to time.
I‘ll go briefly on all main stages and degrees of Oneitis. I’ll link some stories from other Supreme Men who shared their experience with this self-inflicted disease.
When you haven’t slept with a girl yet and you are laying in bed thinking about her.
You are exhibiting symptoms of Oneitis.
When you had met a girl, chatted a bit, later she started ignoring you, and you tried harder to get her attention back.
You have a minor case of Oneitis. It would get worse with time unless you treat it carefully.
When you haven’t slept with a girl yet, and you are laying in bed thinking of her in a romantic non-sexual way.
You are very close to catching Oneitis.
When you aren’t in a relationship with a girl but you think of her all the time. Get nervous before you speak to her. Stalk her around/Online and get jealous\anxious when someone talks to her.
You have a severe case of Oneitis, and the severity depends on time spent feeling these emotions.
Oneitis is dangerous because most men enjoy having it, they refuse to give up on it until it becomes hardly treatable and self-destructive.
It is pretty easy to prevent 99% of Oneitis cases, but the remaining 1% is usually very severe and hard to handle.
The prevention consists of:
1- Never keep a girl in your mind for an extended period, if not at all: a Supreme Man should be leading an exciting life full of activities and have no place or time for pathetic fantasies.
2- Never limit your contact to a single girl or a selected few: always have many cards on your table. Even if you met a special girl or not. Supreme men always have options or strive to provide “options.”
3- Value second chances: if a girl ignored your text/phone call once, for whatever reason, cut all contact for at least a week.- Yes, you risk losing her, but she already risked losing you when she ignored you
If she didn’t care enough to re-initiate contact soon, then it is a sure sign she will ignore you again if you tried to communicate with her. – Understand that when a girl loses attractions towards you, investing more will make it even worse, excellent tips on this later.
No contact after the second time ignoring you? Drop it all and work on another gal.– a trick to deal with that later.
4-Never ask anyone on how to get a girl that have been ignoring you: don’t post it on forums. Don’t seek help at all. That is a sure way to Oneitis and a scarred self-esteem.
THE MORE YOU INVEST INTO MAKING SOMETHING WORK, THE MORE IT WILL SEEM MORE VALUABLE TO YOU
For the love of God, understand this, if a girl is ignoring you, there is no amount of game/routines you can throw her way to get her attention back. The more you try, the worse it will get. It is not what you say; it is the image of you in her head.
Chasing is needy; you will lose your value in her eyes, and ruin any chances to get back together in the future.
JUST WALK AWAY AND NEVER LOOK BACK.
5-Scarcity: there are 7 billion people on earth, 3 billion chicks, 1.5 billion between the age of 18 and 30, 700 million bangable and 50 million are single and reasonably within your reach. Play your numbers, SHE IS NOT THE ONLY ONE!
6- Understand that Soulmate is a complete myth: the myth of “that one special girl,” you should know by now that it is a complete and total nonsense. If there is a soul for Oneitis, it would be this idea. The world is filled with awesome girls that you have access to and can bring into your life. Yes, there a selected few girls in the world that are unusual and hard to find. And these exact girls are the ones you do not want in your life. It is not about how good she is; all girls can be insanely awesome. It is how bad she can get; that is the thing you base your filters on- more on that later.
You have to value yourself, your time, and your presence to prevent 99% of this “disease.”
As for the remaining 1% of the cases, I can’t list simple steps to prevent those. It is a very rare, undefined type of Oneitis, but it happens to the best of us.
As for the cure, there aren’t any pills yo can swallow to take that pain away.
faggy as that sound, it is painful, it is one of the worst feelings a man can experience.
Many treatment options available, it might cure it, or just reduce the symptoms.
The most common:
Bang lots and lots of girls.
Some cases take around ten girls to fade completely, some take less, and some take way more.
You can read about My Case of Oneitis, Titled While She Was Dancing In The Water (Read HERE).
Other Treatment Option includes:
Channel that energy, and use it for something else.
I would recommend you to channel all those feeling into anger.
Yes, anger, not the scream&break shit kind of anger, but the silent, determined with a devilish look on your face kind of anger, the one that you use to heat up the fire inside you, the fire of supremacy.
Use it, whether you were hurt, whether your heart was torn out of your chest in the most brutal way possible, Use it.
Use it, light a fire to burn you into someone better, push you to a higher level of self, of dominance, of success.
If I met the girl in my Oneitis case, I wouldn’t be mad at her; I am appreciative of her for causing that to me.
You see, whenever a wuss starts to grow silently inside of you, only a girl can point it out and reveal it in the clearest way possible.
Only girls can see your hidden flaws; only girls can point them out for you. For you to forge a harder better self.
If you are feeling the heaviness of a Oneitis, I hope this will help
There is an infinite amount of women in this world, more than you will ever be able to meet in a single lifetime.
Most of them are great girls and would be perfect as long time partner if that is your aim. That one girl is not special; that was only you mind-fucking
you. You are in love with the illusion of her and not her per Se. You are addicted to that image of her you created while mentally masturbating in your romantic fantasies. Those times you imagined her with you on a beach in a romantic setting is what caused your mind all this addiction, that is not her, she is probably not like that. She is not perfect or even close to perfection.
You will meet someone better or at least equal to her, just keep going. It sucks a lot. I know it! But fuck, this is one of those hard, amazing lessons of life. Nothing last forever, cherish the time you have, don’t waste it replaying memories or imagining scenarios that probably would never happen. She is 100% not thinking of you right now.
Take a look at yourself, smile, give yourself a pat on the pack. You survived this and now you have grown a bit.
To Recap In Short Lines,
How To Get Over Oneitis?
1-Understand that The more you invest into making something work, the more that something will seem special and valuable to you, be aware of that illusion.
2-Don’t go into scarcity mindset, there are girls in the world that are as awesome and as pretty as she is.
3- Value the limited time you have on this earth and understand that there are better things to do than just feeling sorry for yourself.
4- Meet other girls, and give them a chance to be themselves without comparing them to the girl from your oneitis case.
5- Understand that the feelings you are feeling are real, yet they will go away, use that hurt and channel it into something useful.